


Bone-Weary

by ponderinfrustration



Category: Sherlock (TV)
Genre: 221B Ficlet, Depression, Exhaustion, Longing to Escape, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-11-25
Updated: 2015-11-25
Packaged: 2018-05-03 07:59:48
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 221
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5282993
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ponderinfrustration/pseuds/ponderinfrustration
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The weariness of existence crushes him and all he wants is to stop being, just for a little while.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Bone-Weary

To simply not exist, just for a little while. To hide curled up in bed and merely cease to be. To not have to think or feel – or pretend _not_ to feel – just for a time. Not even to sleep but just to lie there. A day of invisibility, far more soothing than any drug coursing through his veins.

With John, of course. How could John not be there? John is an essential part of the plan. John, to card those callused fingers through his curls and press feather-light kisses to his throat. How could he cease to be unless he had John to bring him back afterwards? To not exist in John’s arms. That sounds like some sort of heaven.

And there must be music. Soft violin recordings playing on the stereo to wash away the sediment in his brain. The music is almost as essential as John. Without the music it would be, what? Trying to sleep? No. Ha has no desire for sleep. Sleep is not going to help him now, just as drugs won’t help him or sex or any of those other things people do. He has long passed the point where they can cure him. There is only one cure for his brand of illness – to lie down and close his eyes and stop being.


End file.
